Analyzing The Almost Kiss

Original Post

First of all, I would like to mention the color of Clara’s shirt, or rather, colors. They have all the colors of the rainbow, which I find a nice touch, very subtle if intended. If not intended, then I guess it’s karma or something.

That said, my take on the whole thing. I thought it was really sweet, the whole time Clara was talking to Marina when she came into the studio again, she had the cutest smile on her face, the one someone has when they are in a new relationship and totally cute about it. She didn't even care about Vanessa's comment, all she cared about was Marina and the message she needed to tell her but everything in her body language told Marina that she wanted her, she wanted her to trust her, to trust her that she was going to choose her, but she needed to take another road for now. For her son, he's so young, he needs her and it's the one thing she can't afford to screw up. She is also comfortable enough with this situation, not to mention comfortable with herself and her own feelings, to make an insinuating comment about sleeping over and how awesome that would be, yet it is unfortunately not a luxury nor a pleasure she can allow herself to enjoy for the moment.

Marina and Vanessa dynamic

After Vanessa's declaration to Marina that their love is eternal, someone said this:

sorry but I have to say this, Marina's behavior with Vanessa makes my blood boil more than ever, when she is with Clara she's pretend that there is nothing between them as only friendship but when Clara disappears for some time, Marina welcome Vanessa with open arms and that's why I can't blame Vanessa for her behavior with Clara if there's someone to blame it's only Marina, she should decisively tell Vanessa that they will never get back together and they don't have common future but what Marina doing? when Vanessa talk about them she only smiles and feeds Vanessa's hopes.

Another person replied with the following:

I don't think Marina feeds it. She doesn't need to say it every time she doesn't want Vanessa. If she wanted, she'd be with her, she's no6 feeding it. The way I see it, she doesn't want to hurt Vanessa's feelings, but they both know Marina doesn't feel that way about her. Vanessa hopes she will again though. And right now, Marina hopes that maybe she can get over Clara, because it's getting painful for her.

My reply:

I agree. If someone loves you and you don't feel the same way back (anymore), when your heart completely and totally belongs to someone else, you don't have to remind them every day that it's not going to happen. It hurts them and you don't want to hurt them all the time. Marina has made very clear to Vanessa that she is totally in love with Clara and that Clara is the one for her, that she's never been in love like this. Vanessa is understandably hurt by this but it's just the way things go sometimes. Vanessa has not made a whole lot of moves towards Marina, she's actually been a really good friend.

She's still a woman in love, this is a desperate attempt to see if there is anything left for her to cling to, if she and Marina are ever going to be lovers again. I can't really blame her for being in love and fighting for her love. She will eventually have to back off and she will. It'll hurt her, but she will. Marina's response was empty, when Vanessa caressed her chin, Marina even looked uncomfortable. She hasn't given Vanessa any indication that they are going to be back to what they were, Marina was just very hurt to not be able to see Clara for a bit, doesn't mean she's open to being with Vanessa now. Her heart still belongs to Clara and she's not even entertaining the idea at this point of anything else with Vanessa. Vanessa just had to give it one more try, something she hasn't done openly in a long time.

In my opinion, Marina's not hoping she can get over Clara. She's hoping she'll see her again soon cause waiting hurts.

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Clara realizes this is what all the fuss was about

A thought or two about the scene where Helena tells Clara they are in love.

Clara is explaining to Helena about the electricity in the air, the charged atmosphere, 'if you touch any of us, you get a shock'.

Helena replies with 'the shivers down my spine' comment. Clara is all, yes, yes, that, ever had that? To her this feeling is new, different. She has no idea what it is, asks Helena about it cause it's so new to her.

Helena says she did and knows it means you're totally in love with someone. Clara explains it all as though this is the first time she's ever felt that before, which means, she never loved Cadu the way she loves Marina now, she never truly desired him when you take the word in its strongest and most powerful meaning. Just in her mind, since women weren't even a thought she ever entertained, whatever she felt for him must have been 'good enough'. She felt attraction to him, affection, he's handsome, a good father, she thought that was what it was supposed to feel like. She never had the feelings she has now.

What I mean is, she's realizing now that this is 'what all the fuss is about'. Being in love is supposed to be like this, she got it all wrong with Cadu. She thought that was as good as it gets and now she sees that it's not, it can be so much better. What she's feeling now is a new thing, she's never felt love and desire in all its glory before, she sees that she's been missing out all this time.

That's why it's all so overwhelming. She's caught so off guard by these feelings she literally doesn't know how to deal with them and what it means.

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Clara admitting to love

A member posted this:
Sometimes I'm watching scenes and Marina is so desperate to know how Clara feels, a little bit. And Clara never opens up lol it's painful but good to watch. I hope it ends in a great Clara declaration scene.

Someone replied with this:
That's why the scene where Clara says that Cadu "notices" what they feel for each other is so important. It's the first time Clara has really acknowledged her feelings for Marina to Marina, and not to every single other female in her life (Helena, Juliana, Luiza)

My response:
Not truly the first time though. She's never said it so clearly, but she did say it, three times actually.

First time is right before Marina 'fires her from her heart'. In that scene she admits to feeling something, even though she doesn't know what:

Marina: Clara we are not children. Everything that we didn't speak verbally, we said all this time with gestures, with eyes, with emotion, almost telepathy. You know what I am talking about.
Clara: I do, I mean, I don't know well. Because I don't know how to deal with this, understand? To me, maybe it's doubt, I don't know, but it's very confusing, I don't know how to deal with this, Marina, do you understand?
Marina: I do, I do. It's exactly because of that that I'm talking for the both of us. Because I can't, I can't live any longer with the presence, the absence of your love.
Clara: You're talking about love?
Marina: Of course I am talking about love, what did you think I was talking about?

This here: She has already admitted to her husband there is something (after her birthday party), she has talked to her sister about it, but in her head, this is an attraction still, she calls it desire. She can't grasp the fact yet that it could be more than that. It simply hadn't crossed her mind. As far as she knew she felt this magnetic pull towards Marina, her world wasn't big enough yet to name it love. When Marina calls it that, it's the first time she thinks to herself: 'Oh my lord, is that what I am feeling? Is that what this is?' Cause she knows she's feeling it too. Now that she got this reality check, things just got more intense on a massive scale, cause she realizes she is right.

Second time: The day after. She goes to Marina and says she had time to think about it, and now Marina is going to listen. Won't quote the whole text but pieces that matter:

Clara: I thought about everything you said to me. About our situation. I can't get your words out of my mind, Marina, specifically the last ones.
Marina: Clara, I can’t remember.
Clara: You will. First you said that for our own good we need to be apart.
Marina: And you're gonna remember like this, sentence by sentence?
Clara: 'Cause I need you to see how they left a mark on me, Marina. Your words have gotten into my head, into my heart.

{--skip--}

Clara: I won't torture myself anymore. I don't want to torture you, either. I want to forget the bad memories, get it? But I need to tell you what stuck with me the most.
Marina: Wait a minute, you're sure this is necessary? You won't hurt me or yourself by bringing back the memory of something I don't want to remember, and maybe neither do you. Are you sure?
Clara: I am. I'm not here closing a door between us, I'm just leaving it slightly open. But you said that for a matter of your survival, you were firing me from your heart, didn't you?
Marina: It’s just a sentence.
Clara: A sentence that makes a lot of sense. And it got me thinking. I don’t have the right to keep insisting with my presence here. I don't have the right to stop your survival.
Marina: No, Clara.
Clara: That's why I came here to say that, I quit.

The conversation with Marina the day before has made her realize where this is headed. This is headed towards falling in love, something she hadn't considered before. Marina's words made it clear to her that she was in the same position. She had mistaken something for an attraction, something, desire. She didn't know what it was. It's why it was so confusing as well, she couldn't pinpoint it, she didn't realize it was love, cause feeling love for a woman like that simply wasn't an option. So she hears Marina say, cause of her love, in order for her to survive, she needs to fire her from her heart. This whole 'love' thing hit her so hard, she's aware now that that is what it is, and it scared her so hard, she's very afraid what that will mean for her and her family. She simply cannot face that idea yet. This new thing has got to be pushed aside, then maybe she can still salvage the situation. She realized that what Marina said about her survival, is exactly the same for her. She's not just protecting Marina, she doesn't want to see her hurt, sure, but she's also saying it for herself. She says she leaves the door slightly open. Maybe later, in time, we can pick something up, we can forget about love, fall out of it, and be friends again. She wants her in her life, but she thinks the only way to get that accomplished at this moment, is to not see Marina, so that the radical separation will work all this out. She even tells Marina she looks at her husband differently, cause of her, basically admitting that what she feels for Marina affects what she feels for her husband.

Marina begs her no and cries in her arms that she won't survive, Clara even admits that she might not either. The realization of her feelings hit her hard, but at this point, she knows it's true. She can barely walk away from her, both cause her own heart breaks from seeing Marina crying like that, and double shatters cause she's hurting just as much. She just feels she can still save this. She still thinks there is a way back.

Later, as she has dinner with Juliana and talks about the attraction to another woman, at one point she says:
'I think I'd only start an adventure like that if I didn't love my husband like I do, or if I loved that woman more than I love my husband.'

It's still an adventure to her, something she can fix. But she also says 'or if I loved that woman more than I love my husband.'
We are at that point now, she is ready to leave him, she loves Marina more than she loves him. She also knows it's not an adventure. it's very very real.

Third time: Marina uses her one foot to hobble over to Clara's house.
She admits she didn't know what to do, she was a mess. She admits she did want to pick up her calls and felt like calling all the time. She admits time isn't passing and it's hard. She admits she is suffering. At this point, Marina basically makes her move, tells her she is in love with her. The words hit her hard, she knew already but hearing them feels so much better, Clara is so hypnotized, if they hadn't been interrupted, Marina would probably have kissed her.

At lunch the day after, she is very aware she is in falling madly in love but she's in over her head, she can't stay away and she knows it's going to happen. She even admits to Marina that Vanessa has reason to be jealous, tells Marina she is... lovely. Still careful about it, but she can't help but stare and smile and gaze and Clara is in major trouble.

So she did say, she did admit. She used different words, but in a few different ways, she has told Marina her feelings. She was just never clear about or acting on them, or how strong exactly they were, the latter also because of her simply underestimating her own feelings, not realizing how deep they went.

So although saying this to Marina now, yes, she's admitting it again, but it's not the first time exactly, in my opinion.

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Why Marina and Vanessa are not end-game

A member posted the following question:

I hope this isnt the case, but what if the writers are trying to suggest that its actually Marina and Vanessa who are ENDGAME?
I hope not, as I want Vanessa to get herself a hottie too.

My reply:
Vanessa and Marina are not end-game. There is nothing in there that suggests anything like it.

From very early on it was very clear that Vanessa had feelings for Marina still. They have a history, they are no longer romantically involved, Marina loves her as a friend, Vanessa loves her as a friend and a lot more, Marina knows this.

The power of Giovanna Antonelli

A member commented on my previous post regarding their balance, she talked about how important Giovanna Antonelli was for this storyline. I will list both her post and my reply:

Hers:
Of course, a role reversal was planned for the two characters since the beginning of the show. We all noticed that Clara was stronger and that Marina was not a girl "who has just fun" anymore.
But what us, international viewers, did not see coming, was GIO. What we see in the "Boobs kiss scene" (I don't know how to name it lol   ), are Taina and Gio fooling around. The shooting schedule of the novelas is so insane that they improvise a lot. A lot of things belong to actors once the set is ready. We're not used to that with us or european shows.

Gio is the strongest person in Clarina. Because of her personnality in real life (She's a leader, she's very open and at the same time Taina is pretty shy), but also because of the challenge she took with this "lesbian" story. At the beginning of the show I had no idea of who she was. All the brazilians here told us she was a star, but I did not see why. Of course she was pretty, good actor etc... But now we've got a good idea of how important she is. She's a real star and with the low ratings she becomes THE STAR of the show. And we can actually see it on screen : she takes the lead on the "boobs kiss scene". She takes the lead for the entire show.

My response: 
You make excellent points as well. I'd never heard of Gio or Taina or Globo or Em Familia before this, but as I started watching, the first scene I actually stumbled upon was the one where Marina is in Clara's room and tells her she loves her. I was struck by both their beauty, but I was even more drawn to Gio, the whole glow she has about her, the way her eyes look at you. How I wished those eyes looked at me like that.

As I watched the story from the beginning, I was surprised to see Clara with the bangs, different outfit, different personality. A different person. The way she held herself, her confidence, it's a totally different person from who she is now. Look at those first scenes, then look at the scene where she talks to Helena where she says she wants to live her own life, she doesn't owe anything to others. It's such a radical shift. You hardly even notice it along the way how radical it was cause Gio portrays her so flawlessly, she eases Clara into it, she eases the audience into it. When you look at the first scenes and the scenes she has now, you can tell the difference. It's miles apart. Pure class.

She's indeed very important to the story, she improvises at the exact right moments, has the perfect responses to the littlest things. For example, right before the almost kiss, when Vanessa says she's never seen Marina so sick with love before like Marina is now. Clara's reaction is so minimal, so subtle, as she looks at Marina when Vanessa says this, her whole body posture reacts as her heart melts with love for her. The class that Gio puts into it, amazing. Whether that look was in the script or not, the way she does it, is all Gio. That look gave me the chills.

I never heard of Giovanna before this. I'm sure glad I've heard of her now.

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Follow up on the dance scene regarding the balance in their relationship

Original post here.

This. I've had had that exact same thought. For me, the first moment that Clara takes control is after Marina tells her she's going to ban her from her heart. That scene starts with Clara apologizing and being sorry for being late etc etc. It ends with her walking out. She goes home to think about things, then goes back to Marina's place and the first thing she says is:

'I've been thinking about what you said, and now you're the one who's going to listen.'